It’s that time of year again…

I’ve often wondered what the point is in these awareness campaigns. If I’m honest, until I started suffering with mental health problems, I didn’t even know there was an awareness week for mental health. 

Et voilà! That’s the point of them – I guess the clue is in the name really (I’m proper clever, me!). It’s been fascinating following the #MHAW campaigns over the past 6 years or so. It’s been strangely reassuring. It’s made me feel not fully alone. Whilst in a way, I am alone, and only I can fight my battles, there’s an element of strength to be found in the knowledge that other people are fighting the same – often irrational – battles. 

(OK, for those of you that have been here before, yes – I know I’ve said that in an earlier blog, but some people are new here and I like to do my bit with recycling)

I’ve just used the word irrational very deliberately. And this is why… In October, I jumped on a plane and flew over to Atlanta in the good ol’ U S of A for a two-day conference. When I arrived at Manchester airport, the airline had messed up my tickets. I got it sorted, screeched onto the plane with my heels on fire, smiled my finest smile and settled down with a passably adequate glass of red and some of those weird pretzel things that we all think we like, but we’re not really sure. On the first day of the conference, I stood up in front of a group of my international peers, and delivered what was **checks modesty meter** a truly magnificent talk on the use of technology in space allocation and management. 

Conversely, and not too far prior to that event, my kettle went bang. I slid down to the kitchen floor and cried as I didn’t know what to do.  

(Full disclosure: It was more of a mild pop, but that sounds a bit lame and we all like a bit of hyperbole occasionally, don’t we?) 

That’s just one example of how confusing and sometimes frightening mental health problems can be. Many people feel we have to overcompensate for our mental illness. We should all to try to be “normal”, shouldn’t we? Yet if I had the flu or something, nobody would bat an eyelid. Go figure!? 

I’m prepared to accept that sometimes, we put some of that pressure on ourselves. We feel obliged to show how fantastically well we’re doing. However… very often it’s pressure from external forces, social convention etc etc. Mostly it’s because generally, people just don’t understand mental health issues, so it’s easier to hide them. 

But in their defence, how can they? Much of the time I don’t even understand it myself!

One of the best explanations I ever saw was from someone on Twitter: 
Having anxiety and depression is like being scared and tired at the same time. It’s the fear of failure but no urge to be productive. It’s wanting friends but hating socialising. It’s wanting to be alone but not wanting to be lonely. It’s caring about everything but then caring about nothing.  
It’s feeling everything at once, then feeling paralyzingly numb. 

Or a lighter version of the theme (for I do try to ensure my words don’t become too dark): 
I’m jealous of toddlers and their lack of social norms. Imagine seeing someone you don’t want to talk to, and the second they open their mouth, you just scream “NO” in their face and run away 😉 

And so, onto #MHAW23 (doesn’t really roll off the tongue, but it’s ace for hashtags!) 

Some time ago, our wonderful Pro-Vice-Chancellor for EDI and People dropped me a line on LinkedIn after I’d posted about mental health. From there we met up, one thing led to another and here we are in #MHAW23 with a photography exhibition under the banner of “What mental health means to me”. The past few months have been exciting, fun, frustrating; but working with the EDI team here at the University to put together an amazing exhibition of photos from both staff and students has been one of my proudest times. 

So, in a perfect blend of unison and harmony, I hear you all demand “why photography, Ade?” Well, that’s easy. Photography is my medicine. Simple as that. It affords me the opportunity to let the world turn without me for a while. (By the way, that’s no mean feat for me. For years I genuinely believed the world would stop if I turned my back.) 

Anyway, as ever, I digress. Whether I’m walking around with a full kit (by the way, it’s not fair that the camera kit is equivalent of 6 bags of sugar slung over your shoulder but isn’t recognised by Garmin on my walks) or whether it’s when I get home and go through the pictures tweaking and trimming. It’s my medicine. 

It has other benefits too; When I’m struggling, I can go to the PC and pick a random folder and look back at my efforts – good and bad. At every stage, it helps me. 

Most importantly though I use it for grounding and mindfulness. Some time back I decided to stop using a tripod. Really – hear me out… With the tripod it’s great, nice and easy. Point and push type thing. However, removing the tripod means I have to slow right down. I have to calm my breathing, take my time, focus on nothing but the photo. If that isn’t what mindfulness is all about, then I’m probably doing it wrong. It works for me though and finding what’s best for you is all that matters. 

“The inane ramblings of a greying space manager” is available from literally no bookshops and from the above, you’ll agree it’s a well-deserved title. However, if you’ve made it this far, then you must be interested. If you’re interested, then you must at some level care. And if you care, then share.  

According to Mind, 1 in 4 people in the UK will experience a mental health problem each year. Therefore, someone you know will suffer from mental health issues. Equally someone else you know will dismiss them. Fact.  

So, pick one, or pick both and talk to them. Point them to the more formal resources from people like Mind and CALM. Or even point them towards my inane ramblings… It just might make the world a bit easier for a few more people. 

For now at least, dear reader, I must leave you. We have around 60 submissions from both staff and students to mount for our exhibition. (Did I mention the submissions are amazing??) I have no idea at all how many visitors we’ll get – if only there was someone at the University who was responsible for occupancy sensors.
Oh.
Wait.
Anyway, glossing over that part, the number of visitors doesn’t matter. Honestly, it’s unimportant to me. What is important is helping. If the work we’ve done helps just a handful of people to find help, or helps people explain the issues to people who don’t understand or dismiss, then it’s a success. All the work is worth it.
Simple as that.

I always sign off my blogs with the same thing. Truly, it’s not that I can’t think of anything else, it’s simply that I mean it. Every time. From the bottom of my heart: 
My thanks go to everyone that helps me. My family, friends, team at work, the support teams. Let’s not forget the charities and volunteers that give up their time from their lives to help complete strangers like me. Give them a thought too – they are outstanding. 

And remember, Talk to someone and ask for help. There’s no shame in it and it will help. 

Maybe speak soon 

Ade xx